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  The Chatter Box : Blathering On
  
  
  
 
Messages 1 2 

Pretty Silly Poetry by notquitenglish on 13 October 2003 1:23am
 
I've discovered a talent for Pretty Silly Poetry, and my tutor tells me if I work at it hard enough, I could achieve Very Silly Poetry in a matter of decades.

I've fallen into the deepest of wells
I'm sorry, I don't like to shout
But I'm in mortal fear
Of drowning down here
Would somebody please help me out?

(I like that one because, although it isn't funny and has little point to it, I think I got the rhythm exactly right, which is a first)

Bert was a young man from Morail
His blond wife went suddenly pale
When asked, "Are you hurt?"
She replied to him, "Bert!"
"I'm afraid I've just broken my nail!"

(shrug)
And this one...
Hickory dickory dock
The mouse fell off the clock
Hickory dickory dail
The mouse, he broke his tail
Hickory dickory dah
Ha, ha ha, ha ha.
(which is funnier if you picture some guy with a thick accent, like Spanish or something, reading it. Yeah, picture Antonio Banderas reading it. That should work)
 
Re: Pretty Silly Poetry by notquitenglish on 13 October 2003 1:29am
 
This one is Rik Mayall's, and loses a lot if you don't have his beautiful, fantastic face drawing the lines out and mugging furiously and shouting at you.

Theatre:
Theatre! What are you, theatre?
Whenever I'm near-te the theatre
I ask myself this question: ....
I don't know! Perhaps I should ask Vanessa Redgrave!
But I don't know Vanessa Redgrave!
And neither do you, theatre! (snort)

Theatre! What are you theatre? (basic!)
Whenever I meet-te friend in the theatre
I ask him this question, with my eyes:...
He sighs, *huh*, and replies,
Like all the other guys,
I don't know! Ask Vanessa Redgrave!
But I don't know Vanessa Redgrave!
And neither do you, theatre! (snort, Now we're moving)

Theatre! Why are you theatre! (total!)Whenever I carry my spear-te the theatre
To do Hamlet (snort)
Right!
I ask it this question:....
It says nothing! Except
I don't know! Ask Vanessa Redgrave!
But I don't know Vanessa Redgrave!
And neither do you, theatre....
OR DO YOU?
 
Re: Pretty Silly Poetry by dangermouse on 13 October 2003 7:24am
 
Oh freddled gruntbuggly, thy micturations are to me,
as plurdled gabbleblotchits on a lurgid bee.
 
Re: Pretty Silly Poetry by Helen on 13 October 2003 5:06pm
 
ack! the nassed humpbugglers are there!
Alas, do the farkinnobblyfrackers care?
 
Re: Pretty Silly Poetry by jake_h_uk on 13 October 2003 6:49pm
 
a
 
Re: Pretty Silly Poetry by notquitenglish on 13 October 2003 7:00pm
 
Oh dear.
I appear to have created a monster.
 
Re: Pretty Silly Poetry by decomposingcomposers on 13 October 2003 10:25pm
 
monkeys ate my trousers,
so i wanted them 2 die,
but b4 i ate them hell rose up,
and stole my monkey pie.

grape lady, grape lady,
what will u do,
wen ive eaten all ur grapes,
& theres none left 4 u.

hello mr lollipop,
i live on the moon,
take me 2 mars in ur lollipop balloon

wen the moon hits ur eye,
like a big peice of pie,
its a pain it the ass...
but not a donkey.

fish eat pie,
so do i,
its full of pie-ey goodness,
very nourishing,
la la la la la dida,
with lots of callories & fat grams,
yum yum,
not made outof monkeys,
because drugs r bad.

the last 1 was a birthday prezzie off a girl i went 2 school with, as u can probbly tell, the use of soft drugs is wot isneeded 2 make poetry as good as ours.

enjoy
 
Re: Pretty Silly Poetry by Sophie-Louise on 13 October 2003 11:11pm
 
Oh wow i love them all people!!

If you like lambs/sheep, look away now.....

Mary had a little lamb,
She tied it to a pylon,
Ten thousand volts shot up it's arse
And turned it's wool to nylon.

Mary had a little lamb,
It was happy and full of frolics,
Then it jumped a barb wire fence
And scratched off all it's...... *cough cough*.

.......................

A blonde-haired lady from Wales,
Applied for a job in sales.
When they asked, "Can you file?"
She proceeded to smile,
And held up her pretty red nails.

There once was a poet named Dan,
Whose poetry just would not scan.
When pointed out why,
He said with a sigh,
"I know, because I try to fit every last syllabul on the last line that I can!"

..............................

Try this tongue twister!!.....

A tooter who tooted a flute,
tried to tutor two tooters to toot.
Said the two to the tooter,
"Is it harder to toot,
or to tutor two tooters to toot?"

Toodles!!

Sophie-Lou xxx
 
Re: Pretty Silly Poetry by Diamond on 13 October 2003 11:56pm
 
Think Ellen needs to see the poem bout the flute - remember the dickerel ellen!!

Yesterday upon the stair
I met a man who was not there
He wasnt there again to day
How I wish he'd go away!!

<>
 
Re: Pretty Silly Poetry by Ken Dunn on 12 February 2017 12:22pm
 
There comes a time
After hitting the wall
To take a dose
Of paracetamol.
 
Messages 1 2 




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